Category Archives: Love

The Trouble with Democrats… and Republicans

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Next time you are arguing about politics (or anything else…) pay attention to what is going on in your mind when the other guy is speaking.  Most people spend that time putting together their next argument and mentally rehearsing it, while only halfheartedly listening to what is being said to them.  They may hear a word here and there, enough to get the gist of what they assume the other person is saying.  And when they get a chance to reply, the same thing happens in reverse.  Which is why arguments are rarely constructive.  Nobody is listening.

James, the brother of Jesus wrote this good advice:

 

“My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,…” –  (James 1:19 (NIV84))

Real listening is more than registering noises in one’s ears.  Listening means attempting to truly understand the emotions and meanings being conveyed.  Real listening has not happened until you can restate what you heard, in your own words, to the other person’s satisfaction.  That last part is the key.  The idea is for them to look startled and relieved, with the realization that you really understood it, your really got it.  If you work for that to happen, before you state your position, then you will have a better chance of being understood, too.  But as long as two people simply lob angry slogans at one another, without listening, not much is accomplished.

It seems to me that much of the hostility and divisiveness we experience in our culture could be reduced or even eliminated by the simple act of listening.  Real listening.  Give it a try and see if James wasn’t right.  Be quick to listen and slow to speak.  And slow to get angry, too…

“…for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.”  –  (James 1:20 (NIV84)

Recognizing the Holy Spirit in You

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Late one night, at the Apple warehouse, a box of new iPhones were engaged in a casual competition to see which one of them was the best.  Unexpectedly, one of the phones was connected to a cell phone signal and then to the WiFi.  The other phones sensed something was amiss and asked him, “What’s that goofy look on your face; what’s going on?”  “I don’t know how to explain what I’m experiencing, but it is almost as though I came to life for the first time.”  The other phones considered him weird and ostracized him.

Okay, maybe that didn’t really happen, but it illustrates the problem of answering the question we posed last time (See: Who is in Control?): “How do I know when I have received the Holy Spirit?”  If you have received Him, you probably agree it’s pretty hard to find words to describe the experience.  But a pretty good start is to say it feels a bit like coming to life in a new way and for the first time.

Some will tell you that receiving the Holy Spirit is always accompanied by speaking in unknown languages, or by falling down and twitching, by hysterical laughter or even barking like a dog.  Perhaps all of these things have occurred to some as they received this mysterious and powerful new life, but it is nonsense to insist that everyone will respond in the same way.  Paul made that point in an extended argument you can read in 1 Corinthians 12 through 14.

Let me suggest a couple of telltale signs  of new life in God’s Spirit.  The first one is that you will begin to notice basic changes in how you think, what you see, what kinds of things are most important, etc.  You may think to yourself, “Well, that wasn’t like me…”  One of the changes I noticed pretty quickly was a desire to read the Bible, when I formerly had found it incredibly dull.  That wasn’t like me.  The changes might be very subtle, and even more noticeable to others.  The night I crossed the line of faith and received the Spirit, when I walked in the front door, my wife looked up and said, “Something is different about you; what’s going on?”   I don’t know what she saw or sensed.

Secondly, these changes will not fade over time but, instead, will grow.  They are not simply temporary emotional responses, such as what you might experience if you get a promotion, but living and growing changes, as you gradually become more attuned to the life of God’s Spirit within you.

Eventually, the life of the Holy Spirit will produce fruit.  Jesus spoke of the difference between a superficial religious experience and one that was genuine.  He said, those who genuinely come to new life in Him don’t wither away when trouble comes but continue to grow and produce fruit (see: Matthew 13:1-23).  What does this fruit look like?  Paul says it looks like this:

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control…”  –  Galatians 5:22–23 (NIV84)

And you think, “Whoa…  that’s not like me!” Notice that these “fruit” changes are external, they impact others around us.  The changes and then the fruit grow as the Spirit changes our character and attitudes to more closely resemble God’s.

Eventually, the Spirit gives us new aptitudes and abilities –  gifts of the Spirit.  And we’ll take that up next time.

P.S.  –  If you are concerned about your situation and need to run some questions past someone, I strongly encourage you to seek out a local pastor, one who is comfortable with the concept of what it means to be born again.

Powered Up by Hope

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Why is it that some people complain all the time, while others seem to boost the spirits of those around them?  Why are some folks suspicious and grumpy and others just seem happier on the inside?  One of the differences is an attitude of hope, a joyful, optimistic expectation of good things coming. 

But what is the best object of hope?  I’d say it’s heaven.  Paul once told some people he had heard about their “…faith and love that spring from the hope that is stored up for you in heaven and that you have already heard about in the word of truth, the gospel.  –  (Colossians 1:5)

Don’t misunderstand: these were no Pollyanna types with saccharin-sweet, vapid smiles, aimlessly drifting through life by pretending things would be better in heaven.  This was no “pie in the sky, by and by” crowd.  These were people bearing up under the harsh realities of vicious persecution.  But with hope from which their faith and love sprang forth!

So, how could they, or we, know that hope for heaven is anything more than wishful thinking?  Jesus tells us, in the strongest and simplest terms, that’s how..  Speaking of heaven, He said,

“…if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you.”  –  (John 14:2b)

That is my favorite line in the Bible.  Jesus didn’t lie to people, fostering false hopes.  One of His trademark expressions was, “I tell you the truth!”  Following Jesus comes with real hope, hope for eternal life in heaven.  If it wasn’t so he would have told us.  And hope just makes everything else better.

Bribing God

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Remember this song?

I’ll give you jewelry and money too
That’s not all, all I’ll do for you
Oh, if bring it to me
Bring your sweet loving
Bring it on home to me
                                                    (Sam Cooke – Bring It To Me)

Great song, but lousy concept.  Because you can’t buy love.  The Beatles almost had it right with “Can’t buy me love…”  But, even in that same song they sang:

I’ll give you all I’ve got to give
If you say you love me too
I may not have a lot to give
But what I’ve got I’ll give to you
                                                          (The Beatles – Can’t Buy Me Love)

Bribing someone to love you is illogical on its face.  And yet, the default posture we humans adopt before God is this:  I’ll pay whatever You want if You will love me.  That is the core idea behind all man-made religions.  Here’s an example from the Old Testament book of MIcah:

6 With what shall I come before the Lord
and bow down before the exalted God?
Shall I come before him with burnt offerings,
with calves a year old?
7 Will the Lord be pleased with thousands of rams,
with ten thousand rivers of oil?
Shall I offer my firstborn for my transgression,
the fruit of my body for the sin of my soul?  (Micah 6:6–7  –  NIV84)

God already and always loves us like a father.  Imagine if one of your children got the idea you didn’t love him and offered to pay…   It’s offensive, isn’t it?  God does not need for us to pay Him with any of His possessions.  So then, what does He want?  This:

8 He has showed you, O man, what is good.
And what does the Lord require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
and to walk humbly with your God.  (Micah 6:8  –  NIV84)

God wants us to stop hurting  one another and ourselves.  He wants us to live with a humble awareness of Him, Who gave us life, Who made this world and Who knows how to live in it.

One last thought.  Eventually a payment was made for sin, the most costly one suggested above – the sacrifice of a firstborn Son.  But it was not a bribe, but a punishment that balanced the scales of justice.

And it was God Who paid.

Because He loves us that much.

No Small Thing

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If I told you how God intervened in my life a couple of days ago, you might think I was gullible or naive.  It was a simple little thing – (OK, it had something to do with hubcaps) – nothing like parting the Red Sea.  But I know Who pulled it off.  I call those brief encounters with God’s grace, winks.  He winks at me and lets me know He’s there and He cares.

Have you ever thought a situation you faced was too small to trouble God with, too silly for prayer?  Consider: Is there anything you face that isn’t small to God?  Check out these words of Jesus:

“Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father.  And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered.   So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.”  –  (Matthew 10:29-31)

God invites us, through Jesus, into an intimate relationship, in which we walk together through the circumstances of life. As we do, we are humbled to discover God cares about how we are doing – even about the “little” things. 

Knowing He cares makes the tough experiences more “doable.”  Jesus spoke those words as He told His followers not to be afraid to tell people about Him, even in the face of physical violence.  Because God cares and He intervenes or not, depending on what is best.

Taproot – Part 4

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“I command you to love me!”  That’s a non-starter, isn’t it?  The greatest commandment, Jesus said, is to love God with all your heart and soul.  But, can love be commanded?  But, instead of hearing the word, command, as a strict order to do something we don’t want to do, think of it like this: This “command” is the most important thing to remember to practice so that things will go well for you. 

God’s 10 commandments were given after He first had arranged a rescue for the people from slavery. 

“I am the LORD your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery.”  –  (Deuteronomy 5:6)

His commands were given to protect us from falling back into any kind of slavery.  In other words, His commands were given to bless us.

“Walk in all the way that the LORD your God has commanded you, so that you may live and prosper and prolong your days in the land that you will possess.”

“Hear, O Israel, and be careful to obey so that it may go well with you and that you may increase greatly in a land flowing with milk and honey, just as the LORD, the God of your fathers, promised you.”  –  (Deuteronomy 5:33; 6:3)

Our love for God is not grudging and forced, it is the natural response toward our Rescuer who loves us and wants the very best for us.  Our love for God is reflected in our paying attention to how He taught us to live, loving and honoring  Him by obeying.  As John said it, “We love because he first loved us.” – (1John 4:19)

The same is true of our love for Jesus, Who rescued us from spiritual slavery to live life to the fullest.

Taproot – Part 3

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Are you afraid to love, believing it will constrain you?  Certainly some neurotic relationships constrain us, but these are not real love.  Real love releases false constraints, setting us free to be all we really are.  That is the kind  of love relationship God wants for us with Himself (See: previous two posts).

It seems counterintuitive: How can submitting to a relationship with someone else, making a commitment, result in more freedom?  Picture those flying suits people wear to jump from high cliffs and soar.  It is strapping oneself into the tight bonds of the suit that allows the freedom to fly.  Additionally, unless they fully commit and jump, they will not fly but fall.  Love works like that, especially love mutually extended between you and God. 

You can see the relationship between love, commitment and freedom in the following two quotes from Jesus.

“Jesus replied, “If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching. My Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him.”   –  (John 14:23)

The word, “obey,” makes us cautious and reluctant, but it is that commitment that leads to freedom.  The Father and Son come and “make their home” with us.  This happens with the life of the Holy Spirit in our souls.  The word for “make their home”, also translated as “abide” is used in this saying of Jesus:

To the Jews who had believed him, Jesus said, “If you hold to (literally, abide or make your home in…) my teaching, you are really my disciples.  Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”  –  (John 8:31-32 with my added note)

It is the love commitment of making one’s home in the teachings of Jesus, the ways of God, that causes us to soar in freedom.  Jesus said, “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” (John 10:10b) 

If you are standing at the edge of that cliff, worried that loving God will inhibit you or constrain you, do not hesitate;  Go for it!  Fully commit and watch how this relationship of love spreads your wings.

Taproot – Part 2

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We have all been hurt by love, at least by what was called love.  So when we hear, “God loves you and wants to be joined with you in a love relationship” (see previous post – Taproot – Part 1), we may put our guard up.  But God’s love is nothing like the human distortions of love.

For example: When humans say “I love you,” most of the time they mean, “I want you.”  But God’s love is not selfish, it is otherish, youish (my spellchecker has just melted down…).  God’s love, His desire to be close with us, is motivated by what would be most beneficial for us.  If you are thinking that’s like giving us cod liver oil, think, “… what would be most wonderful for us.”

Compare the consequences of the separation from God, told in Genesis with the consequences of reconciliation, portrayed in Revelation. 

After separation:
To the woman he said,  “I will greatly increase your pains in childbearing; with pain you will give birth to children.  Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you.”
      To Adam he said, “Because you listened to your wife and ate from the tree about which I commanded you, ‘You must not eat of it,’ “Cursed is the ground because of you; through painful toil you will eat of it all the days of your life.  It will produce thorns and thistles for you, and you will eat the plants of the field.  By the sweat of your brow you will eat your food until you return to the ground,  since from it you were taken;
for dust you are and to dust you will return.” –  (Genesis 3:16-19)

After reconciliation:
He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”  –  (Revelation 21:4)

By inviting us to be united with Him in love, God desires to restore everything to the way He intended, for our blessing.  There is no need for us to guard ourselves from God’s love.  We will never be hurt by it, only blessed.

Taproot – Part 1

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What does God want from us?  Actually, it’s what He wants for us.  It’s love.  God loves us; He wants us to really know that love and respond in kind.  His desire is for us to be in a love relationship with Him.  But what does that look like? 

Let’s start with this: He wants us to be with Him.  Love works best when lovers are together.  In the first few pages of the Bible, the humans doubted God’s love and broke the togetherness they had with God.

Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the LORD God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the LORD God among the trees of the garden.  But the LORD God called to the man, “Where are you?”  –  (Genesis 3:8-9)

God loves us and wants to be with us, connected by love.  When He announced the coming Messiah, He called Him Immanuel – God with us (Isaiah 7:14).  Jesus came to seek us and make it possible for us to be reconciled to our Father.

Turn from the earliest pages of the Bible to the very end and see this goal of love fulfilled:

And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God.  –  (Revelation 21:3)

There’s more to this – lots more.  But keep this thought and chew on it: God loves you and wants to be with you.

Just Sayin’

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It is a good time for those of us who follow Jesus to remember His example.  In His day, the most highly respected people were the super-religious, the ones who made a lifestyle and outward display of doing everything they thought God wanted them to do.  The least respected people were prostitutes and tax collectors (generally considered to be traitorous and dishonest).  And yet,

“Jesus said to them, “I tell you the truth, the tax collectors and the prostitutes are entering the kingdom of God ahead of you.  –  (Matthew 21:31b)

Make no mistake: it was not that Jesus approved of the things such people were doing.  To the contrary, He had compassion on them, knowing how much they were hurting inside.  He did not condemn them or marginalize them; He loved them and offered them a new way of life.

Whoever you believe are the lowest and least respectable, the type least likely to be welcomed into religious circles, those are the people among whom you would have found Jesus.  When He engaged in angry rhetoric, it was against those who puffed themselves up with religious pride and looked down upon those who were suffering from destructive choices.  If we become known for angry rhetoric against the ones Jesus came to seek and save, we do not represent Him well.